A Graveside Service for an Infant

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Hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out within our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us (Romans 5:5, NASB).

Recently, I spoke at the graveside service of an infant whose heart stopped beating in her mother’s womb. The obituary read, “(name withheld) was born silent.” A child conceived, a person born silent, having passed from life in her mother’s womb straight to heaven.

There is a difference between earthly expectations and eternal hope. In my message, I emphasized this thought – a difference between earthly expectations and eternal hope.

Earthly Expectations

Earthly pre-birth expectations fill our imaginations with possibility.  

We consider their future, including preparations for bringing them home from the hospital, first steps and first words, preschool through college education, a driver’s license, prom, hopefully an athletic scholarship to play football at The Ohio State University, marriage, and grandchildren.

And, if you are like me, how can I pay for all of it?

When eternity touches the time of a pre-born in the mother’s womb, we lose these earthly expectations. All the dreams, the still unwrapped baby shower gifts, perhaps a freshly painted nursery, everything ready, but instead a memorial service.

Devastating, but there is still hope.

Eternal Hope

Take hold of the hope set before us. This hope we have as an anchor of the soul, a hope both sure and steadfast (Hebrews 6:18-19, NASB1995).

Death cannot hinder eternity. 

The pre-born infant passes directly from the womb to heaven. All the trials, sicknesses, and disappointments of this life are bypassed for the glories of eternity. As one pastor once preached, “Can you imagine waking up, gaining consciousness, to see God?”

This child is now in the presence of God. Her first words weren’t English, German, or Russian, but a heavenly language instantly understood and understanding all languages. Her first sight, not earthly parents, but the face of God. No learning curve of increased knowledge from K to 12 (and through college), but the instantaneous knowing of a brain unstunted by sin.

Yes, a difference between earthly expectations and eternal hope, and while our initial expectations with all our children may or may not be fulfilled, there’s no doubt, because of the resurrection of Jesus, that nothing dashes eternal hope.

As Peter writes…

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who according to His great mercy has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead (1 Peter 1:3).

When the expectations of earth are shattered, it’s okay to ask, “Why?” In our questions, Scripture doesn’t tell us the specifics of why, but it tells us to trust a God who works all things according to His eternal purposes (hope), not our desires (expectations).  

I find this verse helpful… 

Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be (Psalm 139:16, NIV).

With an infant born silent, we have hope that his/her days, ordained from conception for God’s intended purposes, will not be hindered by an awakening in heaven. 

Also, we will see and know this person, this infant, in heaven. Eternal hope!